How can I expect to tackle adequately such a complex, heavy and controversial topic in one pretty brief article?

Well, I don’t propose to find solutions to every teen’s high school problem in one post.

But, I think a lot of teens who are struggling with high school are experiencing similar problems and share similar feelings, so by looking at what I think are two of the most common issues, we can start to pick apart why so many teens are struggling, and do something about it.

I think that teens who do well at school generally have pretty similar attitudes towards school and studying, while teens who don’t do so well also have a number of things in common.

It’s hard to write on this topic because I am inevitably going to make sweeping generalisations. Of course every teen will have their own particular circumstances, but I have seen general trends among students who are on track to get the grades they are capable of, and those who… well … are sadly not.

Over the years I have noticed two particularly common traits of students who struggle to get results at school.

If one or both of these resonate with you about your teen, my hope is that by digging into these topics you can help your teen overcome these obstacles.

1. They have no (or limited) confidence in their ability to do well at school

If a student has an underlying belief that they aren’t good at school or studying, it’s going to be very difficult for them to get stuck into studying in a meaningful way and get the grades they are actually capable of.

That lack of confidence makes it much harder for them to try hard; they are much less likely to engage in class, to put their hands up to answer a question or say they don’t understand something in case they’re wrong; and they are much more likely to second guess themselves when trying to answer tests and exams or when trying to work something out.

When I was tutoring high school students I would see constantly students who did know the answers but were afraid to write them down before checking with me.

They would ask, “Do I do this next? And then this? I’m not sure…” They needed constant reassurance that they were not about to make a mistake before they attempted an answer.

The issue with not having the confidence to give things a go, or to doubt your ability to get the right answer, is that it stops progress. It holds students back from reaching that “aha I’ve got it!” stage where they know they understand something and have the confidence to apply a concept to exam questions.

Does this sound familiar for your teen? If so, how can you help them overcome their lack of confidence?

Let’s bear in mind I am not a psychologist, so my suggestions below come from a practical / own experience point of view. They are tips that I saw work with the students I tutored when they were suffering from a lack of confidence in their ability.

Firstly — your teen may just need a bit of encouragement.

It’s amazing how much of an effect knowing someone believes in you has. Having someone in your corner, particularly a parent, cheerleading you on, is massively important.

When your teen knows that you are 100% behind them no matter what, they will be more confident in their own abilities and more likely to give school and studying their their best effort.

As a parent you can be more constructive than a simple “you can do it!” My suggestion is that you take a genuine interest in your teen’s subjects and actively help them with homework and assignments (even if you don’t understand it fully!).

This will show your teen that they have your full belief in them and support, and is bound to contribute to boosting their confidence in a powerful way.

Secondly — having the right study tools

The second part to gaining confidence to study is actually having the tools you need to study effectively.

My mantra here at Cram Lab is that anyone can learn how to study, but we can’t expect our teens to know how to do it all on their own! Studying is a learnt skill, and if your teen doesn’t have the tools they need to study, then it’s no wonder they don’t have the confidence to give it a good go.

Once your teen has started to develop their Study System (more on this below) and starts figuring out how to study in a way that works for them, they should start finding studying a lot easier (or at least less daunting) and seeing results.

This is a positive feedback cycle: Putting in the time to study —> getting better results —> feeling more motivated & increased confidence —> put more effort in —> get better results.

And this leads us to trait number two…

2. They think all that studying involves is staring at textbooks

Sure, studying isn’t the fun time that going on holiday with your mates is, but that doesn’t mean the process has to bring you to tears of boredom all of the time.

Studying can be really satisfying as you witness your own progress and the fruits of your hard work, and there are actually heaps of different study techniques that high school students can use to help them process, understand, retain and recall information. It’s really not just about reading text books (unless that works for you!).

Your teen might struggle to remember more than two words if all they do when they ‘study’ is sit down and try to read a textbook.

But what happens when the exact same information is presented in a more palatable format, say in a video or a diagram? That same information could suddenly be a lot more interesting and easy to understand and remember.

If your teen doesn’t know where to start…

You can help them with these two starting steps (if you haven’t already):

They take my free Learning Styles Quiz to figure out what their predominant Learning Style is and what study techniques associated with that style might help them.
They check out the free resources for developing their Study System (if you haven’t given them these already!).

2 of the 8 free resources for developing a Study System you can download from the Study System page

Expecting teens to figure out how to study effectively on their own is like sending them into the wilderness without a compass.

We can’t expect your teen to study consistently or effectively if they don’t have the tools they need.

But once they start figuring out their own Study System and how to study in a way that works for them, studying should be a lot less frustrating.

I am not saying that I have the answers to transform your teen’s attitude and feelings about school and studying overnight, but I do think that there are some tangible and simple things we can do to help them start developing their confidence and study skills.

Thanks so much for reading.

Clare

The Two Biggest Reasons Why Teens Fail At High School